what took you so long?

Dear Soulmate,

Despite the dreary overcast that has appeared to be more of a staple in the weather pattern than just another gloomy day, I feel more or less energetic.

Perhaps the best news of my morning arrived when I learned that the tall ships have arrived in port! At last, my most favorite celebration in Boston is here.

Perhaps there is a sailor out there who caught a favorable wind this season. Who knows.

I joked to my sister yesterday that by the time I finally do meet you I will probably be so upset with you. I will probably start a fight before I even introduce to you my name. I will most likely say, “What took you so long to get here?”

Of course I am only kidding- I will be so happy to have finally found you, and proud for never settling for anything less.

To all the readers in the area, I hope you get a chance to check out Boston’s tall ships! The website is worth a peek, too. It’s very well designed.

Anyway, keep in touch and see you out there!

Love, R

p.s. fun fact: the guy who i am dancing with in my avatar was my first crush… and i just found out this weekend he is engaged. yikes!

p.p.s. is it worth joining twitter?

i need a guy’s perspective

Dear Soulmate,

I should be concentrating my energy elsewhere but I cannot seem to escape the events that trangressed this past weekend that left me feeling dazed and confused.

Do all guys behave this way? Can some intelligent man please explain to me why guys can act so distant and cold?

I am ready to move on and forgive him for everything. I have taken the high road and accepted his change of heart. He is even in a relationship now with someone else. But still, he didn’t even have the nerve to acknowledge me when I saw him for the first time on Friday night after a year.

Why does he go out of his way to make me feel invisible? Honestly, is this just immaturity?

Any advice would be much appreciated.

Love, R

so i finally saw him

Dear Soulmate,

This weekend I finally saw him for the first time since I walked away from him last year.

On Saturday night… as I was catching up with an old friend… he walked over to where I was standing, deep in conversation. He rudely interrupted to ask my friend something, without even looking at me, despite that I was standing right beside him. I began to feel invisible all over again.

“Hi! It’s so good to see you!” I finally said as I gave him a hug- one of which was not well returned.

And that was it.

It was over.

The moment I had come to dread the most for the past year was done. And as I drove home that night I thought about what had just happened.

I was prepared to tell him that although he was so distant and cold to me last summer, although he mentioned another girl’s name, although I never got an apology or resolution from him, although he was now in a relationship [his first one] with this girl, although he was the one who broke my heart… I was happy for him.

Instead I said nothing more and stood still, completely baffled as to why he would behave so cruelly to me.

What could I have possibly done to provoke that? Where had my best friend of so many years disappeared to? Who was this guy who did not even remember the face of the girl who had woken up beside him for so many beautiful summers.

As I tucked myself into bed that night, I began to rehearse those lines I had been practicing for the past year… it was something along the lines of “I’m happy for you, I wish you the best of everything…”

So much for that…
Love, R